The handshake...a neanderthal idea

In this day and age, you think someone would have invented something other then the handshake when greeting someone. It seems so cave manish. With swin flu, colds, bird flu, chicken pox, e-coli, regular flu, other diseases, etc, etc, etc...why shake someones hand to say hello? and what is with the greetings of kissing people on the lips? Who invented these ridiculous rituals? and why have we held on to them until the 21st century...seriously we need to adapt and change. The rest of our society has, why have our greetings not caught up with the 21st century? Why is the wave not more common? I do the wave. I LOVE the wave. The wave is great. haha I try all the time to do just the wave...or try to have my hands busy when I am being introduced to someone, like a drink in hand, and paper in the other or something of similar effect, but you always get those people who insist you shake their hand, even if your hands are completey full, even if you use this line "oh i just washed my hands, their wet, sorry" you always get the one guy who is like "oh thats okay i don't mind, wet handshake me" or the one guy who holds the paper or glass for you so your right hand is free to shake theirs...sigh. take a hint. It is so Neanderthal like...

Today I was listening to my boyfriends ipod and a song came on by a rapper saying how he'll shake your hand but keeps the purrell close by...come on world get with it. stop with the hand shakes, stop spreading these diseases around to everyone...

Perhaps the worst is healthcare workers shaking my hands. Everytime we meet a new respirologist, nurse, tech, or anyone else, they want to shake my hand. I would expect shaking of the hand from a regular joe but from a health care worker, in a hospital where the place is just filling with germs, where they tell you not to even put your purse on the ground for fear of whats on the floor...and then they have the galls to try to shake my hand! I don't think so ladies and gentlemen...I use the ol "oh i dont' shake hands in hospitals...germs, sorry (insert gianormous smile here, so they don't feel offended)"...you'd think health care workers would know...I guess they missed that memo. well that's my Wednesday rant for you!

Also side note, I am going to Barbados. Good warm, glorious, salty air for 12 whole days, with my grandmama, little brother (not so little, he just had his 19th birthday two days ago, BIRTHDAY shout out to him!) and mom. sigh...I cannot wait. Countdown is on kids. Countdown is on lungs. Few more weeks till your breathin' easy old girls. Lungs please just don't get sick on me in the mean time!

For all you friends and family out there, if your sick at all, please please don't come visit our household! It would really really majorly be a bummer to get sick before this vacation...I need a vacation after this 6 month stint of sickness...did you know I've had my picc in for five months...hoy boy. hopefully that comes out in two weeks! but more importantly this vacation is a vacation for my lungs. these girls do way better in warm salty air! so sick people, please stay away! thank you kindly in advance, sincerely H and her lovely lovable lungs.