Welp...(in the word of someone near and dear to my heart) it has been a rough 24 hours...
I won't get into all the details....those that know me well, already know what has happened...my soul is sad...only word to describe it. I'm just sad. Didn't think this is how things would happen...but when one door closes, another one opens... and I know in my case, not just one will open, but many many many and I'm looking forward to them all opening and me walking through them all.
Currently listening to "you can't handle me" by robyn...it's fitting a in way.
I'm listening to a play list from Barbados last December, amazing trip. I will cherish it forever...another hard one to do...but it's okay. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger? silly saying I guess... I'm glad I'm not bitter like so many...my soul is just sad you know? Five years of having someone part of your life...and then not...it's going to be so weird. but it's okay...it's just sad. I don't know what other word to say. Just sad that the timing was wrong, and that I have myself together maybe...and they don't? Half of you don't know what I'm talking about, so I'll just change the subject to an amazing thing!
I worked out today, I am now up to 1 minute and thirty seconds running at 4.0mph with an incline of 2.5 and walking fast for 5 minutes at 3.4mph repeated four times with cool and warm up...and today ladies and gentlemen was the easiest I have ever done. It was incredible. Besides the upset stomach all day, the raised blood sugar from stress of everything that has happened, thankfully my CF lungs are under control. It almost felt like I didn't even work out today. It was so easy. I am so grateful that this was the case.
In the words of bob..."everything's going to be alright"....but damn boy...my soul is sad.
Also I had two margaritas tonight with my mom to lighten the mood...thanks Linds for making me smile for the first time today and reminding me of my love for margaritas haha
Barbados is so soon. I cannot wait to hang out on the beach with my little brother. Family is key. My cousin from the states called me tonight. I lurve her. Good talk. Family is always there for you...
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